SGT MattyW’s Blog

Thorpe Park

By SGT MattyW | July 9, 2008

The day started off fantastically, with myself getting up a bit (Read: A lot) later than I had hoped. After frantically putting on clothes, and grabbing stuff I would need and shoving it into a bag, I was away! I arrived at the station and everything seemed fine. I walked through the barrier, and began the 2 hour long journey to Thorpe Park. Then, disaster! Resty phones: “Hey, Karan and I are on the train, but we don’t know where Judd is.” Shit. I ring Edd, just incase Judd’s decided to get the car with him, oh, he has, fantastic, thanks for informing me.

I then meet up with Resty and Karan, and jump on the train to Waterloo East. So far, so good. So we’ve been sitting on the train for a few minutes and, just before we pull into Petts Wood, Resty says “It’s good you managed to get your ticket Karan.” I scream “FUCK!” and everyone in the carriage glares at me. Crap, I’ve left the sodding tickets at home. We get off the train and sit at Petts Wood. I decide to ring mother: “Yes, Yes I know, Yes, Sorry sorry sorry, Yes, OK, Cheers, Sorry, Bye” was the gist of the phone call. We get a train back to Orpington, I pick up the tickets from a rather disgruntled father, who had hoped to have a lie-in, and we were off, again. Many puns about Deja Vu were made by all parties. Just imagine if Resty hadn’t mentioned the tickets until we were at Waterloo, or Staines, or we hadn’t realised until we reached the theme park.

Oh well, back on track now. The plan has done a running jump out of the window, so I have no idea when all of the trains are. We get off at Waterloo, and walk in the pouring rain down the entirety of the platform, because someone, not naming names, decided it would be fun to just “Jump on here.” We amble across the flyover between the two stations. We decide that we’ll just jump on the first train that goes to Staines. Resty spots it on the board, but I can’t see it, so we faff around for 5 minutes while he’s yelling “There, Matt! Look, it’s right there.” After I eventually spot the bugger, we continue on our journey to Staines.

We get off the train at Staines, and it is fucking chucking it down. Make no mistakes, I didn’t know the sky could hold a sea worth of water. Being unfamiliar to the area I got lost on the bloody platform trying to find which way out we were meant to be going to. Then we spot the Thorpe Park bus just about to leave, so we barge past some Community Support Officers, because what can they do anyway, and leggit down the steps. We hop on the bus, and pay our severely overpriced £3 return fair to the park. On the bus I receive a phone call from Edd, who has a poor reception, repeatedly asking my location. I inform him I’m on the bus, but that’s not enough. He rings me twice more to find out where I am, and I inform him we’re stuck in a traffic jam, and to meet us under the massive “Entrance” sign in 2 minutes time.

When we arrive, I understand why he was impatient. The entrance sign is completely out in the open and he, along with Judd, his brother and brothers friend, were getting drenched by the onslaught of water. I quickly usher everyone to the safety of the entry hut and dish out tickets. We’re in, fantastic. Now to find the lockers. We all disagree on where the are, when someone points out the sign that informs people they’re downstairs. We grab a locker, and bundle everyones stuff in at once, because you have to pay a quid every time you use the locker. It would honestly have been cheaper to bring a locker with me.

We set off, content that all of our belongings are safe. Now, where do we go. “Lets go to slammer!” say the people who have been there for half an hour already. I don’t really want to, I’d rather start of with something a tad more timid, like Nemesis Inferno. Which, lets face it, is hardly in the same league as a teacup ride. Resty and I head off to Nemesis Inferno, while everyone else wants to begin (I say begin, Din and Oli had already been on Stealth and Nemesis once) with one of the most extreme rides in the park.

We arrive in the queue to find people walking back past us “It’s shut, the sensors are broken” was the general consensus. Never mind that, we thought. Collosus was closed for repairs (Dammit), so behind Stealth that makes Nemesis the second biggest attraction in the park, they won’t let it be shut for long. Within 5 minutes it was open again, and with most people having left the queue we managed to reach the front in around 15 minutes, which was probably the longest queue I was in all day.

Now everything after that is a bit of a blur to be honest, I can remember what rides I went on, but not when or how long I queued for. Some other significant events include: Nearly throwing up on Samurai after eating an XL Bacon Double Cheeseburger, Going round on Tidal wave 3 times in a row, Going round on Nemesis 3 times in a row.

How many times I went on each ride:
Chief Ranger’s Carousel: 1 (Hell yeh, Extreme teacupping)
X:\ No way out: 1
Slammer: 1
Loggers Leap: 1
Rush: 1
Stealth: 1
Samurai: 2
Rumba Rapids: 4
Tidal Wave: 4
Nemesis Inferno: 5
Total Rides: 20
Average Cost Per Ride (Including Travel Costs): £1.88

I’d say we got our moneys worth.

Also, did I mention it was really wet? It rained solidly all day.
“I’ve been less wet having a bath” - Edd

But, despite everything that could have, or did, go wrong, I had the best time of my life. Nothing can match the feeling you get when you open your eyes at the top of the tallest ride in the theme park, and you scream “OH FUCK!” at the top of your voice, and your mate turns to you and laughs. Fantastic. :D

Topics: Holidays/Occasions | 2 Comments »

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